Other people's problems with TTC

I was talking with one of my co-workers on the way to the Metro the other day and she mentioned that her sister who got married a few months ago was felling upset that day because she had thought she was pregnant but suddenly got her period. She told me that her sister was going crazy trying to get pregnant for the last 3 months and she was absolutely obsessed with it and feeling down because nothing was happening.

I knew exactly how she felt but I did not want to say anything because I haven't really shared my TTC efforts with anyone at work except my boss and one co-worker with whom I'm really close. I know it would probably be easier if I tell more people but I just know that they'll keep checking me out to see whether I'm pregnant already and if I don't succeed I'd feel like I have to explain to them. Sometimes I want to tell the whole world just to get some moral support but at other times it just seems so personal.

I had to tell my boss because when I had my chemical pregnancy I took 3 days off work to recover and then I had a bunch of doctor's appointments as a follow up so I didn't want her to think that I'm just slacking off work since I'm pretty healthy otherwise. She was and still is very understanding and event though she is a pretty conservative business woman I tell she feel for me. She told me that both of her sons were preemies; born in the 7th month, the second one was just over 2 pounds when he was born. So she's had a lot of issues with pregnancies and babies and she sort of knows how I feel so that's good.

Worried about Clomid side effects

So I was in Barnes & Noble over the weekend and I found a book in the New Books section called "A Few Good Eggs". It's written by two girlfriends who experiences infertility for several years so they write about literally everything related top that including quotes from their friends, doctor's opinions and their own stories, of course. It seemed like a really interesting book so I opened to the chapter about fertility drugs and found some very disturbing stuff about Clomid.

Basically, many people said that they gained weight while taking Clomid and experienced severe mood swings. There were some pretty horrible stories about mood changes, headaches and weight gain so I got really scared. I don't want to gain weight, that's the last thing I need. And mood swings - I get those on my own anyway, no need for any chemical help with those :) Urgh, all this stuff is making me really worried about starting Clomid. But I just have to do it, at least for one month and see how I feel. I had really bad side effects from birth control pills when I was taking them a few years ago - severe nausea being one of them, and I'm really worried about side effects of hormones. I wonder if some people don't have any side effects from Clomid?

To make matters worse, I was talking to a friend's mother this weekend (she is extremely overweight and I never asked about it but always assumed she had some kind of weight disorder) and she mentioned that after her first child she was trying to get pregnant for over 10 years and was put on some kind of hormones which caused her to gain weight and she was never able to get it off. She also said the hormones ruined her skin and her hair. She was taking them for a few years with no result when she finally got pregnant with my friend but by that time she was so overweight that her period had almost stopped and she did not even realized she was pregnant until she was 7 months along. Very scary story... Just thinking that she got so overweight from the hormones terrifies me. Of course, that happened over 20 years ago but still...

Oh well, I'm not going to think about this anymore, I'll just take the Clomid for a month and see how it goes. Wish me luck!